Updated: Jul 7
Recently, I've come across several empath groups on social media that frustrate me somewhat because they seem to promote and support the idea that being an empath equates to suffering, and that is just not so.
Many empaths, including myself, are able to live happy, successful, balanced lives and achieve our wildest dreams, sans the 'suffering'.
It's true that being an empath, we're more sensitive to energies from others and the environment, images, videos, etc., but you can learn to manage your energy, choose what to expose yourself to, protect your energetic field, develop your gifts and live a life filled with inner peace, appreciation and joy.
Does being an empath or intuitive mean you have to live a life full of drama or suffering?
No, that’s a huge misconception. Just because you feel so much around you, it doesn’t mean you have to live a life of suffering. You can learn how to manage your gifts, energy, emotions, and how to detach from situations, events, people and anything that doesn’t serve you or belong to you and live a happy, fulfilling drama-free life. See the “Navigating Through An Awakening”on this website for more information.
Does being an empath mean that you have the responsibility to save the world?
No. You’re here to serve your life purpose (live your truth), not control external events or other people.
There is a difference between helping (empowering) and rescuing (control).
Helping is a choice, not an obligation and before you make that choice, make sure you have the ability to set healthy boundaries.
Boundaries are important, so if you have a tendency to rescue everyone around you, maybe it’s time you learn to do things differently, so you don’t feel so drained emotionally, mentally, physically and energetically.
Also, there is no such thing as a helpless person, unless they’re a defenseless child.
Adults can most certainly take care of themselves and must be allowed to find the strength within to get themselves out of the hole they got themselves into. Guiding them in the right path, if they ask for help, is OK, but don't serve the solution on a silver platter. Otherwise, they’ll feel disempowered and you’ll feel taken advantage of once you’ve solved their issues for them, and they walk away without so much as a thank you.
Tough love? Not really, just healthy love.
But, what about my past trauma and its effects on me?
Almost no one is exempt from being haunted by past events, especially empaths. Even some events, which may seem insignificant to others, may affect a person considerably. On a quantum level, past lives and soul agreements can haunt us in our current lifetime.
The difference is whether you are choosing to remain in 'victim' mode vs. 'warrior' mode, and sometimes for some, 'victim' mode has a secondary gain.
Personally, I've tried several therapies over the years to help me deal with past trauma and the effects of it, which to my surprise, had affected every aspect of my life, including the choices I made, the relationships I had, the work I selected, etc.
However, it wasn't until I discovered Rapid Brain Recode and Hypnosis that I was finally able to break free of the shackles of those effects, and the best thing about Rapid Brain Recode and Hypnosis, is that the focus is on empowering you to find solutions inside of you, not talk therapy, which is why I decided to certify in both and it is my mission to empower empaths to step into their power and help them live their truth.
Anyone who's experienced past trauma can absolutely take control of their destiny and become conscious creators of their future vs. being sucked into a black hole of helplessness, which, by the way, is only an illusion.
How do I develop my ‘gifts’?
For starters, meditation, meditation, and more meditation. I know most of you want to go from zero to 60 in record time, but there’s a reason for taking your time developing your gifts. Baby steps and laying a foundation will make you more balanced and better at managing the more advanced techniques.
If you don’t already practice meditation, start with guided meditation. There are an unlimited number of meditation techniques out there (free on YouTube).
Meditation will help to calm your addiction to thinking. My preferred method is Zazen Meditation, but choose one that resonates with you. Just try different methods till you find the right one.
If you have a hard time letting go of thoughts, don’t fight them, allow them through and out again until no more thoughts come in. Eventually your mind will run out of thoughts and allow the monkey brain to calm down and if it doesn’t don’t sweat it. Your conscious mind will try to fight it because it’s trying to keep you from changing (a perceived sense of safety), but change is required in order to break old patterns, so stay on it. Keep practicing until you relax and once you relax, the process has just begun. The next step is to just be, a.k.a., "hold space".
Once you’ve mastered meditating twice a day for 20 min each session, once in the morning before you get our of bed, so you set the tone for your day and before you go to sleep at night, to calm your mind for better sleep and as a gratitude meditation , you can move onto more advanced techniques that address your higher-self.
Always start with the basics.
How do I protect and balance my energy?
These are just a few suggestions, though there are many more:
· Smudging for cleansing your energetic field (you can smudge with a great variety of dry herbs, including sage, rosemary, palo santo, and more)
· Visualize your aura coming as close to your physical body as possible to prevent it from intertwining with other people’s energy, especially when you are in public places, like shopping malls, parties, and large events
· Visualize an energy bubble around you that is made of the strongest metal in the universe with a reflective exterior shell to reflect anything that doesn’t serve you back to the source
· Qi Gong and Tai Chi to cleanse and balance energy
· Epsom salts baths to cleanse energy, relax the physical body and detoxify
· Walk barefoot in nature to ground onto Mother Earth’s energetic field
· Connect to the energy of nature by spending more time in nature and hug trees, place your palms against the trunk and close your eyes, focus on the energy coming from the tree. Don't be surprised if this feels overwhelming at first
· Wear crystals and/or place them throughout your home to help balance your energetic resonance. Great healing crystals are clear quartz and amethyst, but you can get chakra sets if you're ready for the next level
Start with this and note what happens.
Gaby Cano is a Psychic Medium and Medical Intuitive, Reiki Master and Instructor, Certified Conversational Hypnotist, Sound Healing Practitioner, Certified Magnetic Mind Coach (Brain Recoding), intuition coach and author based in Toronto, Canada. She can be reached through her website: www.findyourinnerzen.ca Instagram: @superherohealing Facebook: @psychicmediumgaby